A micro-brochure aimed at pool owners

I have this so far. any suggestions?
I will have brochure holders up at 32 local pool stores in Houston. (The local chain I left before starting my window business) If there is a decent ROI I will pursue Leslie’s which has another 40 or so stores in Houston. I want to make it as effective as possible so I’ll do a brutal makeover on this idea if it will make it better. Thanks.

Oh yeah, The center picture has much better resolution, but I couldnt get it to transfer to jpeg correctly. I’m sure its a user issue.

You need to change the font and you have some grammatical errors, but its a great idea.

Here is the thing… humor and/or cute is VERY hard to convey. I would dump the “yer” and “winders”. It is not funny, it is silly. Do you want to look silly?

You need to capitalize all of WANTED… like the old western posters did.

It is an interesting approach, but I would spend VERY little time on such a passive, non-direct way of getting business. You will [I]likely[/I] see very little action from this.

You need a list of their customers… that would be waaaaaay better.

but, who am I to say. Let us know how it does.

Waaaay better idea! I had not considered how passive that it was till you mentioned it. Maybe I could use this idea as an article for a newspaper, and turn the brochure into direct mail. Thanks for joggin my brain.

I love the WANTED approach…very nice idea.

I think I like the Western slang, too (not to start a fight or anything…), I think it fits nicely with the “wanted” angle…

Funny is VERY valuable if you can pull it off…

Make people’s lives a little more fun and make them laugh a little, and they’ll respond.

(I would also consider using some kind of ‘filter’ on the pool filter equipment photo to make it look more like a western pic)

Do many of you see this issue with pool owners you service? I have more science on this mystical occurrence of water spots on windows in my head if anyone has any questions or about anything pool chemistry related for that matter. (PM)

ALOT of people in Texas really do speak like this.

“How much ‘er ya’ gonner charge me fer doin’ the winders?”

“Well sir I’d like to stop by and see your property so I can give you a more accurate estimate”

"Quiet woman, I’m on tha tele-phone with the winder guy! Thats fine son, just watch out fer the chickens when ya come out "

“Yes sir. I’ll see you in half an hour.”

“Yer horse must run real fast. My horse is slower than a snake full o’ buckshot”

ALOT of people in Texas really do speak like this.

Well, if these people are also your target demographic, then by all means, speak their language!

Wow; all these years I’ve been pronouncing it “yur!”

That’s West Texas!